Why is prayer so hard?

Have you ever wondered about that? For something so central to our faith, so crucial to our connection with God, prayer often feels like trudging uphill in the rain. Shouldn’t it be easier to talk to the One who created us, the One who knows every hair on our heads?

But the truth is, prayer can be tough. We sit down to pray, only to find our minds wandering off to our to-do lists, our worries, or what’s for dinner. Or we open our mouths, and the words don’t come. We feel clumsy, distracted, or unworthy.

If you’ve ever felt like this, you’re not alone. I’ve been there, and so have millions of others. Tim Keller explains:

I can think of nothing great that is also easy. Prayer must be, then, one of the hardest things in the world. To admit that prayer is very hard, however, can be encouraging. If you struggle greatly in this, you are not alone.

The Still Hour, a classic book on prayer by nineteenth-century American theologian Austin Phelps, starts with the chapter “Absence of God, in Prayer” and the verse from Job 23:3—“Oh that I knew where I might find him!” Phelps’s book begins with the premise that “a consciousness of the absence of God is one of the standing incidents of religious life. Even when the forms of devotion are observed conscientiously, the sense of the presence of God, as an invisible Friend, whose society is a joy, is by no means unintermittent.”

Phelps goes on to explain the numerous reasons why there is such dryness in prayer and how to endure through that sense of God’s unreality. The first thing we learn in attempting to pray is our spiritual emptiness—and this lesson is crucial. We are so used to being empty that we do not recognize the emptiness as such until we start to try to pray.[1]

The question lingers: why? Why does prayer feel so hard sometimes?

The Struggle Is Real

Prayer is hard because prayer is important. If prayer were just a nice idea or an optional spiritual practice, the enemy wouldn’t bother interfering. But prayer is the lifeline between us and God. It’s where battles are fought, wisdom is gained, and peace is found. No wonder it feels like a struggle.

We Live in a Noisy World

One of the biggest reasons prayer feels hard is that we live in a world full of noise. Be honest—how long can you sit in silence before reaching for your phone? Notifications buzz, screens light up, and the constant hum of busyness surrounds us.

Even when we manage to carve out time to pray, our minds are still noisy. Have you ever started a prayer and, two sentences in, found yourself thinking about an email you forgot to send or an errand you need to run?

Blaise Pascal said, “All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone.” He wrote that in the 1600s. Imagine what he’d say about us today.

We Don’t Like to Wait

Prayer is also hard because we’re impatient. We live in a world of fast food, two-day shipping, and instant streaming. Waiting feels like a waste of time.

But prayer doesn’t work on our timetable. God doesn’t run on two-day shipping. Sometimes, He answers in a moment, but more often, He works on a slower, deeper schedule.

Have you ever prayed for something and waited… and waited? You’re not alone. The Bible is filled with stories of people who waited. Abraham waited decades for the promised son. Moses waited forty years in the wilderness. David was anointed king but waited years before he sat on the throne.

Waiting is hard. But in the waiting, God is working.

We Feel Unworthy

Another reason prayer is hard is that we often feel unworthy. Who am I to approach God? we wonder. My life is a mess. My faith is weak. I don’t know the right words.

Let me tell you something: God doesn’t love you because you have all the right words. He doesn’t listen because you’ve earned it. He listens because you’re His child.

When my daughters were little, they didn’t have to impress me to get my attention. They could stumble over their words, get distracted mid-sentence, or even just sit in my lap without saying anything. I loved being with them.

God loves being with you. You don’t have to clean yourself up before you come to Him. You can come as you are—messy, distracted, and broken.

We Don’t Know What to Say

Sometimes, prayer is hard because we don’t know what to say. The needs of the world feel overwhelming. Our hearts feel heavy. Or maybe we’re just not sure where to start.

The apostle Paul knew this feeling. He wrote, “We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans” (Romans 8:26).

Did you catch that? Even when you don’t have the words, the Holy Spirit prays for you. He takes your groans, your sighs, and your silent tears and turns them into prayers.

Prayer is a Battle

Finally, prayer is hard because it’s a battle. The Bible tells us that “our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world” (Ephesians 6:12).

The enemy knows the power of prayer. He knows it aligns our hearts with God, strengthens our faith, and advances God’s kingdom. That’s why he fights it so fiercely.

When prayer feels hard, remember that you’re stepping into a spiritual battle. You’re not just whispering words into the air—you’re storming the gates of heaven.