Not as good as we think we are

Published: Fri, 07/05/19

 

 

My problem is not just my lack of character; it is that I can't even see how badly I lack it. Humans have an almost limitless capacity for self-deception. For instance, psychologists speak of a massive integrity blind spot in human nature called the self-serving bias. We make ourselves the heroes of our stories to exaggerate our role in victories and to absolve ourselves of blame for failure and error.

In one survey, 800,000 high school students were asked whether they were above or below average in social skills. If they were accurate, they should have split 50–50. Want to guess what percentage of students rated themselves as below average? Zero percent! Furthermore, 25 percent of all students rated themselves in the top 1 percent!

This self-serving bias130 extends to every area. The majority of people in hospitals suffering from crashes that they themselves caused rate themselves as above-average drivers! You might think that education would make us more self-aware. You'd be wrong: 88 percent of college professors rated themselves above average; 25 percent rated themselves as truly exceptional. Another survey of two hundred sociologists found that half believed they would become one of the top ten sociologists in the world. No wonder there are such conflicts around tenure and promotion.

National surveys show131 that we claim to feel nine years younger than we actually are, and we claim that we look five years younger than other people our age.

And the church is not exempt. George Barna did a survey of pastors—people who are paid to teach on texts like Paul's command to the church at Rome: “Do not think of yourself132 more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment.” Ninety percent of us consider ourselves above-average preachers.

And perhaps most ironic of all: when people have the concept of the self-serving bias carefully explained to them, the majority of people rate themselves as well above average in their ability to handle the self-serving bias!

John Ortberg, When the Game Is Over, It All Goes Back in the Box (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2008).


We have just released a new Bible Study based on John Ortberg's Book, When the Game is Over It All Goes Back in the Box, by John Ortberg.

These lessons are available on Amazon, as well as a part of my Good Questions Have Groups Talking Subscription Service. Like Netflix for Bible Lessons, one low subscription gives you access to all our lessons--thousands of them. For a medium-sized church, lessons are as little as $10 per teacher per year.

Lessons include:

Lesson #1
Chapters 1 – 2
Learn Rule #1
Be Rich Toward God

Lesson #2
Chapters 3 – 4
Three Ways to Keep Score
Master the Inner Game

Lesson #3
Chapters 5 - 6; Untie Your Ropes
Resign as Master of the Board

Lesson #4
Chapters 7 – 9
No One Else Can Take Your Turn
Remember Your Stuff Isn't Yours
Prevent Regret

Lesson #5
Chapters 10 – 11
Play by the Rules
Fill Each Square with What Matters Most

Lesson #6
Chapters 12 – 14
Roll the Dice
Play with Gratitude
Find Your Mission

Lesson #7
Chapters 15, 16
Beware the Shadow Mission
Two Cheers for Competition

Lesson #8
Chapters 17 – 19
More Will Never Be Enough
Winning Alone Is Called Losing
Be the Kind of Player People Want to Sit Next To

Lesson #9
Chapters 20 – 21
Collect the Right Trophies
The King Has One More Move